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Millennial Sickness, Hypochondria and Snot Levels
There is something vaguely ironic about the recent discovery that Kurt is allergic to grass. After years of watching his eyes stream and his chest heave at certain times of the year – symptoms I originally put down to Karma for abusing his body, (because I’m compassionate like that), and the sad reality that none…
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Why Do Some People Make You Feel That Pursuing Your Dreams Is A Cop Out?
Currently, when I’m asked at social events ‘what I do’, I metamorphose back into a little girl, look down at the floor nervously and respond, usually in a pathetic whisper ‘I’m trying to write a book’ or ‘I’m trying to make a career out of writing’, then pray they don’t ask me about it. The…
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Help! I Had A Sex Dream About Malcolm Turnbull
I had a sex dream about our Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull the other night, which was particularly disappointing having forked out twenty dollars that afternoon to ogle see Chris Hemsworth in the latest Thor movie. For those of my international readers who don’t follow Australian politics religiously, and haven’t a clue what an understated sex…
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I Like To Think An Old Dog Can Learn New Tricks…
However… every trip out of the home these days seems to involve some shaming new public lesson in technology that highlights my mom-ness and has zero human interaction or support. I pity the really old people who used to see a trip to the shops as the one chance in their day for conversation. I think…
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Do We Influence Our Children’s Drinking Habits?
I am reading Richard Glover’s wonderful family memoir “Flesh Wounds” at the moment – a Book Club choice, and if I’m honest, not the sort of book I would normally choose, yet I am riveted. It is the story of his childhood in a dysfunctional family that ultimately provokes him to trace back through his…
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The Link Between Insomnia In Middle Age And The Boomerang Generation
Biologically-speaking, there is a proven link between sleep problems, peri-menopause, and menopause. It has something to do with the dying noises created by your ovaries, dreams, and looks as they wither, and a lot to do with how much you hate the person sleeping next to you. However, my own research lists other contributing factors,…
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How Much Do You Drink?
That’s the question that makes you cross your legs in shame in middle-age, similar in awkwardness to when the doctor used to ask you how much you smoked or how often you have sex, or (more pertinent these days) when was your last mammogram? Fact: every smoker lies. The ‘walk of shame’ these days is…
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The Lost Opportunities Caused By ADHD
Sadly, the main take-home from the ADHD conference I attended last week was the pervading sadness in the room at the mention of “lost opportunities”. Unlike other neurological conditions, ADHD appears to leave a bad taste in the mouths of some, and as such, the condition attracts unfair criticism. There is some truth in the…
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Every Woman Has Had A Harvey Weinstein Experience
I had to take the old man’s car to the garage the other day to get a quote for some hailstorm damage. When we first moved to Australia and our friends warned us about hailstones as big as golf balls and that the priority in terms of buying a house was to have either a…
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Fairly Standard Share House Behavior
We suspected that the old-fashioned water tank in the new house might prove a problem. With two twenty-somethings that think that fifteen-minute long showers are normal because they are used to a water-on-demand system, it was never going to be an easy task to educate them in the consideration of others. You’re welcome! I’ve decided…
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Things I’m Too Old For – Music Gigs
This post is the first in a new series called “Things I’m Too Old for;” an idea I came up with the other night when we went into the city to watch a gig roughly two nights before we moved house – cos that’s what you do when you’re about to experience one of the…
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The Perils Of Moving House
NC was super helpful on the day It is somewhat ironic that after weeks of persuading Kurt to allow us to buy him a bed base for his mattress so that our house no longer resembles a student house, our own base refused to bend those extra ten degrees necessary to get it up the stairs…
LOUISA SIMMONDS 